5 weeks

So the past week has gone pretty well.  I had a mini-meltdown the other day because I had some pretty bad back pain and my cramps were different than usual.  Normally they feel like mild AF cramps, but this time they were more painful and on either side of my ute.  And the back pain just sucks because I started getting it pretty bad a couple days before my m/c and it is a sign of m/c.  So I POAS that night at 19dpo, and my test line turned super dark immediately–like once my pee touched the area.  And it stayed waaaay darker than the control line.

We are sooo excited to leave on Saturday for Arizona!  I know John doesn’t feel this way, but I know that the weekend is going to go by super fast, and then when I get back, we have our ultrasound!  This whole thing is still surreal.  Half of me doesn’t believe it is actually happening, and about all of the other half of me is convinced it will end with me losing this baby too.  I haven’t let myself get too excited about it.  Kevin, my boss, is amazing.  He is so family oriented and really believes in work-life balance.  He was so upset when we lost the baby last time and he has been rooting for us ever since.  So when I told him on Monday, he was so excited!  Last time though, he told our District Manager, Steve, just for planning purposes since I would have been going out on maternity leave right before Christmas.  And then he forgot to tell him that I lost the baby, so when I saw Steve a couple weeks after the loss, he asked me how I was doing and when my EDD was again.  I was mortified and almost started crying right on the sales floor where he said it.  He felt like a complete asshole and so did Kevin.  So this time Kevin asked me when we will know that everything is okay.  I told him when I gave birth and got to bring the baby home.  But I told him we need to wait until we have at least a couple ultrasounds before we say anything to anyone so the earliest would maybe be 9-10 weeks, but possibly more like 12 weeks after the NT scan.  He said it will be hard to contain his excitement 🙂

John told his parents on Sunday.  He calls them every Sunday night at 9 p.m.  They are happy for us, but I think everyone is really cautious and even they don’t believe it will ever happen.

So, I am going to do this little survey possibly every week–I may add or take some questions away as we go.

5 weeks

Symptoms?: SUPER bloated–started right around 4w4d just like last time.  I feel huge.  I have nausea every day, but haven’t gotten close to throwing up yet.  My nipples are still tender and my skin is super dry.  I pee about 10 times per day.  Oh, and I’m freakin exhausted.

Weight gain?:  No, I think I’ve actually lost a couple lbs.  I was doing WW before I got my BFP, and I’ve been continuing it since.  But if I’m hungry I’ve been eating but I’ve been trying to keep it healthy.  Except for we went over to Chris and Emily’s the other night to watch the Rose Bowl, and they got pizza.

Best thing that happened this week?:  Uhh…..I’m still pg.

Any baby-related purchases this week?:  I bought a Snoogle.  I’m a belly sleeper and last time I was pretty uncomfortable by 7-8w between the bloat and the sore boobs.  And sleeping on my side hurts my back and my shoulder, so I figured a Snoogle would help–so far so good, but I still have to get used to sleeping on my side.

Milestones reached?:  5 weeks 🙂

What size is the baby?:  It is now the size of an appleseed!

Belly picture:  (aka Bloat Picture)  Yeah, I know, I freakin look 4 months pg.  And none of it is from holiday munching…


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